Podcast Transcription

Melina: Welcome to “Flippin’ Off,” a purpose-driven podcast about flipping houses and making a difference.

Dave: Dave Boswell here, New Wealth Advisors Club, along with my lovely wife again. Hi, honey.

Melina: Hello.

Dave: That’s Melina Boswell. And we are continuing from a couple weeks ago. We were talking about our club meeting and just overcoming obstacles and all that good stuff. If you didn’t catch that one, pause this one and go back one episode, and listen to the previous one, because we’re going to expand on that. And today, we’re gonna focus on really debunking kind of the top two, three kind of buckets we’ve come up with, was we kind of reevaluating this conversation. And the obstacles, the challenges that people are having inside their business. So, I’ve got here Mr. Tim John Wilkinson.

Tim: Hello. Good morning.

Dave: How you doing? One of our senior investors in the club, probably one of the most creative dudes I know and…he’s…

Tim: I’m having a hard time saying thank you right now, but okay.

Dave: He doesn’t receive real well.

Tim: I’m, like, getting all red over here, all shy as if I’m in front of the room.

Dave: Yeah, it’s too early to have a few beers by now. And then I got John Slater here with us again. Good morning, John. How are you doing?

John: Good morning. Very well.

Dave: Very well. I don’t know if I’m just getting used to your accent or if you’re actually starting to sound normal to me now.

John: You’re starting to sound more like me, so it’s starting to rub off a little bit.

Dave: That sounds like rush. And then we got Oscar Solares, the Oscar Solares.

Oscar: Hey, good morning, guys.

Dave: All right, so we’ve been having a conversation behind the scenes and kind of breaking down, crunching all the data, if you will, from a club meeting, and really breaking these down into some buckets. And then trying to leave you guys with some nuggets, if you will, like really some takeaways from this podcast. And then you’ve really gotta look at yourself and figure out where you might fit in to one of these buckets if you’re presently not satisfied with the results you’re having in your own businesses. So, the number one thing we came up with…number one across the board would be time. True?

Tim: Absolutely.

John: Yes.

Melina: Yup.

Oscar: True.

Dave: So everybody… So we had time. And a couple weeks ago, John was talking about time and what that struggle looked like for them, and so forth. And then I know that Melina and I have definitely been down that vein before of, “I mean, time, where are we gonna find it? How are we gonna do this?” and so forth. And I wanted to hear from maybe each one of you about, you know, what did you do to overcome the obstacle of time? Because every one of us have different challenges, with the exception of Tim that doesn’t have any children that he knows of.

Melina: Wow. He’s really…

Dave: Poor Tim. Tim has been the brunt of the best jokes that will never leave, we’ll be talking about for 10 years from now. It was so great. Anyways.

Tim: That joke is much better than the ones from last club meeting.

Dave: Yeah, right.

Tim: I like that one better.

Dave: Yeah, you do, sure. Anyways, with that, so every one of us had to overcome time challenges. And I’d like to hear…maybe give everybody just a little bit of a tip or insight into your own…what did you do to overcome time?

Melina: I think Tim does a great job at…you know, to insinuate that if you don’t have children, then time should not be an issue is…obviously, that’s not realistic.

Dave: Totally.

Melina: But, you know, it comes down to something else. And so I think Tim has a great way of explaining, you know, “I don’t have enough time” versus what’s a priority.

Tim: Right.

Melina: So that’s really what happened for you, right?

Tim: Yeah, because when I got started in the business, I had been laid off. So, frankly, I had nothing but time, if I look back and I’m honest, and time was still an excuse that I used. I think in the last podcast we talked about my tendency to move the phone from one side of the desk to the other and be really busy doing stuff that frankly wasn’t going to make me money. And it wasn’t until I was able to really grasp that… First of all, for me, the excuse of time became like I never wanted to be a victim. Right? I had learned for me that the term “You’re playing the victim” had a different meaning than what I grew up thinking.

I thought being the victim was when other…like I’m the victim of Dave. Dave did something to me, or, you know, John did something to me. But I realized that I actually was the victim and I was playing the victim of my circumstances. Right? And I was making up circumstances to be that victim. And when I heard myself saying that time was my challenge, I had to start asking myself questions that were more introspective, like, “What about me?” And I realized that it really became down to the difference of me saying, “I don’t have enough time,” versus “That’s just not a priority.” You know, when I realized that I couldn’t…I told myself that I would never say, “I don’t have time.” I would always tell myself, “Well, it just wasn’t a priority.” So then I had to own, like…

Oscar: “This business really isn’t a priority right now.”

Tim: I realized that I was creating it for myself. I was creating this limitation. And then I had to own that this business, even though I said it and I felt like I owned, that this was my business and… How do I explain it? I was in a spot where I felt it, like, “I’m all in. I’m doing this business.” But I realized that I wasn’t. This business isn’t a priority, because I know the things that I need to do, and I’m choosing to move the phone instead of doing the things that I know. It’s like last week, you mentioned how do you lose weight. I know how to lose weight.

Melina: Totally.

Tim: Eat less, workout more.

Melina: Less caloric intake.

Tim: Right. So we know how to do it, but it’s not a priority.

Melina: That’s right.

Tim: “I don’t have the time to go to the gym.” “No, it’s not a priority.”

Melina: That’s exactly right.

Tim: And I realized that, first of all, I had to give up this idea that I was…I had to understand that…I had to own that, “You know, that’s okay. Right now this business isn’t a priority.”

Melina: That’s right.

Tim: And I’m getting the results of somebody who this business isn’t a priority, and that’s why…I can no longer complain about the results I was getting because this is who I’m being. And that shift for me, simply that little shift made it to where I can now look at it and go, “No, this business is a priority and I’m going to choose to do the things that are important.” And it wasn’t real easy, but that was a thought that I had every day when it came time to either move the phone or make a call.

Dave: I think everybody needs to stop, hit rewind, and listen to what Tim just said, because he just gave you a massive, massive nugget. Like really, really, the maturity that it takes to stop and say, “Okay, I’m saying one thing, but what I’m doing is actually the complete opposite.” And, you know, as we were talking to different club members, there was definitely…less people that were willing to be honest and say, “No, the excuse is really in my head, and I’m not doing the things that are gonna produce the result that I’m ultimately looking for.”

And the few people that are willing to look in the mirror and have that conversation, those are more than likely the people that are going to…well, they’re either gonna step up and change them, or they’ll realize they’re just wasting their time and they’ll probably be moving on to the next shiny object. Right?

Melina: Absolutely. I think it was so key what you said, Tim, when you realized being a victim was you had chosen to become a victim of your own circumstances, and I think that is such a brilliant statement. If people can really grasp that and how ineffective that is and how much of a block that is to your success, is, you know, allowing circumstances to dictate, you know, how you act and what you do.

So, I think that’s a really important thing. And ultimately, it just comes back to, like, looking in the mirror. You know, what I tell people all the time, like, if you… And I know I said these words to Tim before. I actually said to him, “You gotta be willing to look in the mirror, not just, like, look in the mirror, but you gotta be willing to step into a closet full of mirrors that have bright, bright lights and like a magnifier, you know, and be naked. And look at it all.” And that is so uncomfortable for us. Like, you have to understand that’s how honest you need to be. You can’t hide from the magnifier mirror with big lights. You just can’t. Like, you see every single flaw, everything. And that’s what you need to be willing to do.

And I remember Tim and I having conversations and we would get into such descriptive words like that, like don’t just look in the mirror. You know, what if the mirror has fog on it or whatever? Like, get real. Get really, really real with yourself. And if you do, well, you’ll break out. You’ll break through exactly how Tim did.

Dave: One of the exercises that I’ve done with, you know, small groups and mentorship with people, and, you know, time is number one. You know, everybody comes with the same thing. Every one of them will say the exact same thing. And so, I take them to an exercise over a period of several months, but those of you that are listening to this, just do this for yourself. When your time is a challenge, when you wake up in the morning, every 30 minutes, stop and make note of what you did the last 30 minutes.

Just stop. And you realize, “Okay, so when I woke up, you know, I showered, I got ready. And then I stopped and, you know, I was texting with someone for three minutes. And then I was taking a phone call from someone who was wasting my time for 10 minutes. And then, oh, I had to check Facebook, and that was three minutes. And then…”

Melina: Three hours.

Dave: “Next thing you know I was playing a silly game and four hours went by.” Do whatever you do, do not download that game. So, when you actually take inventory of your time, like if you looked at time as a commodity and I have 24 hours a day, and where are my priorities in that 24 hours a day, and then you broke it down. And then at the end of the day, you put all those things into a bucket and you said, “Okay, here’s my money-making activity. You know, here’s my job. So let me just carve out my job, because, you know, in my job I have no time.” Well, I even challenge that. You get an hour for a lunch break. Does it really take an hour to eat your lunch? No, I can eat my lunch in, you know, 15 minutes. Well, does that mean I have 45 minutes to pull a leads list, set up a route?

So on my way home from work today, I don’t have to jump on the freeway. Maybe I stop and I knock on three or four homeowners’ doors and leave sticky notes, or maybe that’s that same route that I took, you know, last week and I do follow-ups this week. You know, everybody can overcome those things if they really looked at it and said, “I only have 24 hours, and this is a priority in my life, so I’m going to find X number of hours a week to do that.”

Now, the flip side of that is, well, I want to have the results that these guys are having or these guys are having. Well, they’re making a lot of money and closing a lot of deals. Well, yeah, but my schedule doesn’t allow for me to have 15 hours a week to do that. I can only start with five.

Melina: Right.

Dave: That’s okay.

Melina: Sure.

Dave: Right? But when we get in our head, because, like, I’m not having the results. But more than likely you’re just doing what Tim used to do and shift the phone from one side of the desk to the other.

Melina: Absolutely. I agree with that. I think that’s right.

Dave: And so, we really need to look at time. And when somebody comes to me and says, “I just don’t have the time,” the first thing I’m gonna say is, “Okay, so, for the next two weeks, write down everything you do every 30 minutes.” And then they typically don’t come back.

Melina: That’s exactly right. And I think that the truth is, if people literally dedicated five hours consistently a week into their business, they would see a huge dramatic increase in the likelihood of success. Guaranteed. It really has to be consistent. It can’t be five hours this week and then, you know, one hour next week, and then nothing the following week, and then all of the sudden I’m gonna make up for the last two weeks by putting in 10 hours. That actually doesn’t really work. You have to be consistent and have a plan. If you don’t have a plan, then you’re just gonna fail, for sure.

Dave: It’s a snowball of momentum.

Melina: Absolutely. A big mo.

Dave: It’s why we call it building a pipeline.

Melina: Absolutely.

Dave: You can’t go out and make up that work. Well, I haven’t done anything for a month, so this Saturday and Sunday I’m just gonna work all day. Right? Because all the pipeline, it takes time and building relationships and following up with homeowners and so forth. And you can’t make up for that on Saturday and Sunday this month and then I’ll catch you next month.

Melina: That’s right. That’s exactly right.

Dave: Right, so. So, go ahead, Tim.

Tim: I’m sorry to interrupt, Dave. There was a couple things. First of all, one of the questions that I got was, how do I become disciplined? And I think that you kind of touched on it when you said, you know, if you can’t do 10 hours, do five. And when you said it can’t be one hour this week and then I’m gonna make up for it. The becoming disciplined is like do what you can do and you know you can do and build the habit and the muscle that it takes to actually do something every single day in your business.

Melina: Absolutely.

Tim: And just start building that, as opposed to, “I need to work 20 hours a week and I’m gonna do it all on Sunday.”

Melina: Right. No, it’s not a good plan. It’s not a good plan.

Oscar: I like the fact that you said plan, because when you actually structure it correctly, you can develop the plan that fits your reality.

Melina: That’s right.

Oscar: Your time slots. Versus trying to fit your time slot into somebody else’s plan.

Melina: Oh yeah. That’s really good.

Oscar: And so, if you’re able to wrap your brain around the fact that you need to really say what’s important, what can I get done, how can I get it done, and you become proficient and efficient at it, man, five hours is nothing. You can knock it out of the parking in only five hours.

Melina: Absolutely. That’s why when, you know, you said 15 hours a week, I was like… You said five hours a week, and I was gonna say, I challenge…I mean, I know you can find five hours a week. Everybody can. Every single person can.

Dave: Of course.

John: And I think the time management side of thing is, you know, it’s good practice for when you do end up making it and becoming a full-time investor. I struggled time management, you know, even though going back, I didn’t have much time but I still carved out a lot more time than I thought I had. Now, you know, how does that affect me now? Well, you know, I’ve got my day planned out from day to day, morning, afternoon, evening. I know exactly what I’m doing. And then, you know, a couple of days ago we had some issue with, you know, a contract and a lender and a foreclosure and an auction day that takes two, three hours out of your morning to solve it.

And suddenly everything you had planned just went out of the window. You know, those homeowners I was supposed to call, I now didn’t call them. Well, can I shift them now to my afternoon? Yeah, but I’ve got the afternoon planned for this. And it’s now about reorganizing. So time management is a skill that you’ve really gotta perfect and get help on and, you know, ask people how they do it. You know, how do you carve out your day to make sure… You know, we joke about this but everybody says, you know, “Does Melina really have 25 hours in a day? Because she gets that extra time from somewhere to do what seems to be way more than is possible.”

Dave: Yeah, for sure.

Melina: That’s because I don’t let anything…if I can’t get to something, I acknowledge it and then I make the next time that I’m going to do that. I think that’s the biggest thing, is just acknowledging where you are.

Oscar: I think part of it also and…I think part of it is expectation. People seem to…they see Jeff and Flora on stage a couple weeks ago, catching, you know, big checks, and they don’t know the amount of time and energy that Jeff and Flora put into it. And from their perspective, and I think a lot of it has to do with all the other noise out there online, the “Become wealthy overnight. Own 100 properties by the end of this year” kind of thing, you know, it comes from that. And I think that people come here and they have this expectation that they’re going to become…they’re gonna solve all their challenges with one deal, or they’re going to just do this. So they want that outlook, but in reality, you have five hours a week to run this business, and I don’t care what you do in those five hours, you’re not gonna retire next year doing that.

Melina: Absolutely.

Oscar: And that’s okay. You just need to know where you’re at.

Melina: That’s exactly right.

Oscar: Yeah. So one of the things that for me, at that club meeting when we were talking, was, you know, somebody said…the question, what’s one of your biggest time wasters? And the answer was my grandkids. And that bothered me to hear that.

Melina: Yeah, that’s not a time waster.

Oscar: Right. And we had that conversation. We had the conversation that that’s not a time waster. “But they live with me. And as I’m there working, my baby comes up and he sits on my lap and then I play with him for a little while.” And we’re like, “That’s not a time waster.” But then she followed up with, “But then I work…that just means I work from 10, 11… My family is like, ‘You don’t always have to work till 11:00 at night.'” And she’s like, “Well, yeah, I do because I gotta get this stuff done. But I took the time in the day to do what was important.” Again, priority. The baby is a priority.

Melina: Absolutely.

Oscar: And so is the business, and making those kinds of adjustments in your day, like John was saying.

John: Yeah, you lose an hour of sleep or two.

Melina: Big deal.

Oscar: And do you lose that hour of sleep for your baby or for the business? Because you will not lose that hour of sleep for your business.

Melina: No.

Oscar: But you’ll lose it every day for that baby, and that’s the mindset shift, I think.

Melina: Absolutely.

Dave: Yeah, and if you just fast forward it just a little bit, I’m growing a business for that baby.

Melina: Yup, that’s exactly right. Absolutely.

Tim: That ties in well with we’ll build relationships within the club, partner with people, right, leverage each other’s time schedules and so forth so that you can allow more time to be used towards your business. It may not be your time but your partner’s time.

Dave: Yes, that’s a good segue into bucket number two, because bucket number two comes down to, we heard knowledge/confidence was kind of a big thing, right? So that, to me, is just absolutely insane. I really…

Melina: For anybody who’s a club member, it’s insane.

Dave: Yeah, anybody who’s inside of our club…if you’re listening to this podcast, I’m not talking to you, if you’re not a club member. But the idea of knowledge and then the confidence, I get the idea of I lack confidence because, you know, I’m not there yet. You know, I don’t have all the answers, you know, that kind of stuff. I can understand it and I can relate. But when they say, “I lack knowledge, so therefore…” You know, that knowledge, not only is it…inside there’s just so much experience inside of our club, and so many people. If you or I don’t have the answer, we go get the answer from someone else who has the knowledge. And it doesn’t mean they have more experience than us, it just means they may have the knowledge in that topic or whatever it is that we need.

We don’t go, “I don’t have the knowledge. I don’t do anything, and I’m just gonna stay there.” Or, “I’ve gotta get all the knowledge first. I’ve gotta learn everything before I can pick up that phone.” There was a lot of people that are down that vein. But as we peel that back, right, it really brought us to what I think the biggest bucket really is. And that biggest bucket really comes down to fear, the big F word.

I mean, we broke down and, like, peeled back the layers of this onion. I can get the time, and that time may not have anything to do with fear. But when I break down, like, the knowledge and the confidence and what that looks like, as we peeled back the layers of that onion, there was an underlying sense of fear. Would you guys agree with that?

Oscar: Absolutely.

Tim: Yeah.

Dave: So give our listeners some tips. We’ve all been there. Heck, we’re there different times in our businesses as we speak. So what do we do to combat that? What are suggestions?

Oscar: So, for me, fear shows up in two different ways for me. One is the bad way, which is I freeze. I become paralyzed or whatever you wanna call it. And then the other one is that it sparks the fire that I need to do the things that need to be done, so that I can achieve all the right stuff. And there isn’t a balance to it for me, it’s more of I need to be conscious of the fact that I’m starting to drift towards the paralyzed side, and I need to make a quick U turn and go back the other direction. And for me, it’s been the ability to train myself and acknowledge that I have that flaw to be able to identify it fast enough to avoid it.

Dave: And then what do you do?

Oscar: Then I reach out to someone.

Dave: Bingo. Everybody hear that? So, the Marine Oscar got this. I can handle this, has fear and recognizes his flaw of “I sometimes retreat and go in my own head and my own space.” And then when he’s now able to identify that, he puts his hand up and says, “I need help.”

Melina: Well, there’s two proven responses to fear, right? It’s flight or fright. I mean, fright is already there.

Dave: Flight is already there. So it’s fight or flight.

Melina: Exactly.

Dave: And I think that was a big one that we heard last night, and a takeaway. So we all have the fear. And I say last night, but, you know, us talking amongst ourselves. Inside every one of us have our own fears, right? So we have those and then we have to identify them, and then what do we do about them? And then what do we see in successful club members and what do we see in the people that kind of stay there? And John, I think your group was really talking about…you know, some of them are even afraid to ask for help.

John: Yeah, and what we identified there was the idea of, you know, maybe not necessarily a fear but a little bit of fear of wasting somebody’s time, which I found completely crazy to say. I’m at the club 24/7. I’m out there building relationships with new investors, new students, and with senior investors, and I don’t feel like I can waste somebody else’s time. Because my door is open to somebody else to say, “Hey, can I help you? Can I answer your question for you?”

The same way that, you know, you guys, when you founded the club years ago, you passed that down to the next generation of senior investors, who have then passed it down to the next generation of coaches. I, myself, turned into now a senior investor, handing that down to the next line of coaches. And we are all committed to being able to pass that back or pay it back, if you wanna say.

So I overcame my fear, when I first joined the club, of I just hung around people. You know, I felt a little bit intimidated hanging…you know, kind of sneaking in this corner or that corner and listening to Tim and Oscar’s conversation that blew my mind that I had no idea what was happening. And maybe I didn’t speak up straight away and say, “Tell me more about that.” But maybe there was an opportunity to say, “Hey, Tim, I heard you talking about that. You know, what happened?” and gave my thoughts to it and Tim was open to talking about it. So you’ve gotta overcome that fear of asking for help. That’s the bottom line.

Dave: I’m gonna put a little asterisk right there because, you know, when somebody says, “I wanna ask for help,” I wanna make sure the right people are asking for help, and that those people are doing all that they can, meaning they’re showing up all the time. What we’re now looking for is that person that shows up once every six months and then wants to say, “Hey, John, can I hang out with you for the next six hours and ask you all the questions that have been covered over the last six months of class and so forth?” That’s not acceptable. That’s just a taker.

But the person that’s, “I’m making the club meetings, I’m coming to class, I’m doing the activity, but I have a question. And I’m stuck here,” or “I’m not having the result that I’m looking for here.” That person living in fear of asking, that’s an irrational thought process, really. The person that doesn’t show up and then wants to take your time, obviously…

John: That’s different.

Dave: That’s different. So I encourage anyone who’s listening to this that, you know, show up, and as you’re showing up, “Hey, you know what, I’m not having the same result. Maybe I can measure my result against your result and see if there’s something…” One lady, she said, “Well, I’m knocking on doors every week and I’m just getting nothing.” And I said, “Okay, what does nothing mean?” And she said, “Well, I don’t have any deals.” I said, “Okay, so let’s stop for a quick second and say when you’re knocking on doors, how many doors?” “I don’t know.” “Okay, and how many conversations?” “I don’t know.” “Are you always by yourself?” “Yes.” “Are you good at having conversations with people?” “I don’t know.”

I said, “Yeah, those are all things you don’t know because you have nothing to measure them against. I have nowhere to even give you advice. Here’s my first layer advice. Find someone with more experience, find out how you can bring value to their business, and ask to create some accountability with them so you can go and learn from them. Because you’re out there knocking on doors. I don’t know, are…I don’t know the first thing about the perception that the person’s answering the door. I don’t know how you carry yourself. If you look the way you look right now, the chances are good that what’s coming off of your persona is they don’t want to talk to you because…”

Melina: You mean not how they look physically. You’re saying…

Dave: No, physically as in their facial expressions and…

Melina: Their energy.

Dave: Their energy, their mannerisms, what’s happening inside is coming out.

Melina: Is coming out.

Dave: And I said, “So maybe that lack of confidence that you’re feeling, because your expectation is I’m having zero result. But what is your result? You can’t even tell me how many doors it is, you can’t tell me how many conversations, you can’t tell me how many conversations you’ve had in follow ups. So in your head, I’m just doing all of this. So now you’ve created this false sense of reality, this fear that you…that’s how you go.” And so, what you’re doing is you’re checking the box. They told me to work five hours, so I’m doing those five hours, but I’m getting zero.

So we gotta peel that back just a little bit and say, “Okay.” So, going back to Tim, what did Tim do different? Tim said, “I’m gonna start being around everybody that’s having results. I’m gonna do everything I can.” You just heard John say, “I even sometimes was just lurking in the shadows.” It’s kind of creepy, by the way. “I’m lurking in the shadows, listening, not even understanding everything. I’m not being that guy that’s like, you know, ‘Stop your whole world and explain it all to me.’ But I’m immersed in it.” I don’t know how to describe it other than, if you wanna do this business, the people you spend the most time with should be doing this business. And it shouldn’t be the people with zero experience plus zero experience equals zero experience.

Melina: Zero experience.

Dave: Right. So, common problem that I see, brand new club member grabs a brand new club member. They come together and they go, “Hey, we’re both brand new. Let’s be accountability partners.” How do we hold each other accountable when we don’t even know what we’re doing?

Melina: Yeah, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing in that if they wanna be accountability partners in terms of staying committed to what they said they were going to do, that’s an okay thing.

Dave: There you go.

Melina: But together, they need to probably seek help from somebody who has more experience.

Dave: There you go.

Melina: And that’s really the magic in the club.

Dave: Isn’t that really how we kind of go back to that bucket of confidence and overcoming our fear? For me, that’s part of what we’ve created. We have class and we know this about class. So you come to class, we teach you all day at class. And if we said, “Go out on your own and go do this,” the majority of the people would not go do it on their own.

Melina: Agreed. Totally agree.

Dave: Every one of you sitting here…

John: Agreed.

Oscar: Absolutely.

Dave: Would have said, “No, I’m not doing that.” So that’s why we said, okay, so we need to create this opportunity for coaches. And we even have that now where we call it shadow session, where you go there and you can be that fly on the wall that John’s talking about, right, and just listen. You know? Watch somebody else going through that experience. Then you go out again and then now that you’ve had some experience and some role playing and coming through the different classes and so forth that we do, that you can go, “Oh, okay, this isn’t so bad. I can do this too.”

If you’re not doing that and those steps and then you’re just checking that box to get my five hours completed, and I have nothing to measure it against, I just…I said to the lady, I go, “Does any of that make rational sense to you of what you’re doing?” She goes, “I never thought of it that way.”

Melina: Yeah, absolutely. That’s so much of what needs to happen, is a…people don’t really understand how easy the shift is. Like, it’s that simple. It is that simple of just a shift in the way that you are thinking and the way you’re viewing things.

Dave: So how do I find…her next question, “So how do I find that person?”

Melina: Really?

Dave: Yeah. How do I find that person?

Oscar: You mean in the middle of a group of 12 people who are all sharing their strengths and weaknesses?

Dave: Isn’t that crazy? Right? So…

Melina: Inside of a larger room of 130 people?

Oscar: That all are looking for partners as well.

Melina: Absolutely.

Dave: Instead of a group of several hundred all over California and Arizona, Nevada and what have you, and they’re all looking for the same things. You haven’t even asked because you just now identified this is a problem. So now what’s your next step?

Melina: Ask for help.

Dave: “Maybe I could ask for help.” I said, “Well, is it help that you’re seeking? Right? Are you really open to that help? Because if I went out with you and I said, ‘Here’s the problem. You’re really not good at the door. Your conversation is not good. What you’re saying is too much. Chances are really good you actually talk more than you listen.’

Melina: That’s probably exactly right.

Dave: Would you be okay with hearing that?” And she goes, “It would be kind of painful.” I go, “Would it? Which is more painful, for me to say that to you, or for you to keep doing what you’re doing and having the same stinking result? Because how much longer are you gonna do it?”

Melina: Not long.

Dave: Not long.

Melina: No. That’s someone who’s close to quitting.

Dave: And it was like, “Oh, gosh.” “So don’t take it so personal, but I have a feeling that you probably don’t listen all that much, because everything I’m saying to you right now, we’ve actually said to you many, many, many times. You’re just now maybe looking in the mirror, and maybe it’s because you’re in a smaller group and…”

Melina: Sure, which is great.

Dave: Which is awesome.

Melina: And that’s a…

Dave: What a breakthrough.

Melina: Yeah, that’s a huge breakthrough. That’s a huge breakthrough. It’s awesome.

Dave: I won’t say her name but…

Melina: No.

Dave: She knows who I’m talking to.

Melina: Yeah, it’s great.

Dave: I’ll make sure she hears this. So, any caveat anybody wants to add to that before we wrap this thing up? Because time, we can deal with time. The fears, I get it, but, gosh, you have such a huge club and such a huge following. We have a massive success on there. And, you know what’s really cool about the club too is that, like, there’s no trade secrets. Nobody walks around and says, “I have this secret information and I’m not gonna share it with you.”

In fact, we heard Jeff and Flora say, “Hey, we figured out how to do, you know, this system down in Orange County, and we’re willing to take a couple of people down to San Diego, over to LA, out to San Bernardino, Riverside counties and teach them exactly what we do in Orange County so they can duplicate it in their own businesses, for nothing. We’re willing to donate our time to do that.” I don’t know where you find more people like that. Pretty freaking awesome.

Oscar: One of the things that stands out is our perception is our reality.

Melina: Yes.

Oscar: And when your perception is skewed, right, and you’re not willing to ask for help or open to even being coached, then your perception will never change.

Dave: There you go.

Oscar: So you have to be willing to step out on that limb, and hear the tough conversations like you just shared, and be willing to not only receive it, accept it, but then act upon it.

Melina: Amen.

Oscar: And then your perception completely flips around and it’s almost like having an out of body experience. If you could look at yourself day-to-day at what you really do, you’ll be like, “Man, I’m a really butt head here. I don’t really get things done.” And it goes back to…because for me, when I went through that exercise that you were talking about of…I think we started with every 15 minutes and it became everything 30 minutes?

Melina: Yes.

Oscar: Of charting my time. Man, it was embarrassing to look at the stuff that I was writing down. Right? And how do I communicate that to my accountability partner? I was like, “Man, I need to shift.” Right? Because now I’m in a magnifying glass here and I don’t wanna be that guy. But you have to really shift that perception of yourself and then it becomes clear of the path that you have to take.

Tim: For me, I might be a little different. Because I realized… There came a point from the confidence level and all that, that I shared earlier about realizing that I was a victim and victim of circumstance. And that victim…for me, the victim of all of those circumstances that I could put in front of myself, I realized that I was able to…I narrowed it down to a few different things, but one of them was flat out greed and pride.

Greed and pride were huge for me, and I didn’t wanna reach out to somebody because, frankly, I didn’t want them to take a piece of the deal, a deal that I didn’t have, by the way, because I wasn’t getting results. But if I got that deal, I didn’t want to split that profit.

Dave: So, in other words, you were saying, “If I ask somebody for help…”

Tim: They might wanna be…

Dave: And they might say, “Well, that’s fine. I’ll help you with that, and we can actually get that deal done. But I want a piece of the pie.” And you were like…

Tim: I didn’t wanna do that.

Dave: It’s all my pie.

Tim: Yeah.

Dave: But wait, all I have is a pie tray.

Tim: There’s not even freaking crumbs on it.

Oscar: Not even a recipe.

Tim: So, it wasn’t until I really got in the mindset of partnering, and now, you know, we cut checks. Oscar and I did a deal not long ago and we cut checks to Flora and Jeff. But we also cut checks to our entire team that we put together that had little if nothing to do with this particular deal. They bring value in other parts of our business and enabling Oscar and I to do the things that we did to get this deal closed. But we got them paid. And that shift, for me, to be able to do that was huge, because to go from “I don’t wanna partner with somebody” and staying stuck in…

Melina: Broke?

Tim: Staying stuck and broke, yeah.

Dave: Zero times zero is?

Tim: Zero.

Dave: Still zero.

Tim: Right. So, I was so in the, “Oh, man, like, I’m broke right now. I was laid off. I just need that one deal and $30,000. If we do the $30,000 deal, I need that whole $30,000 for myself because that will fix everything.” And when I realized that that’s not working, it’s getting me zero and I’m staying broke, then I partnered up with…I created a partnership, and that partnership, for me, became like a little security blanket. Because I perceived the people that I partnered with to be strengths for my weaknesses. And frankly, they gave me the confidence to go do things that I wasn’t able to do.

And then I realized after that that all…I don’t know why, I didn’t need them, because I had the club, and the club was willing to do that. And then that’s when the shift happened for me that I can just partner. And that the club is here. And if you’re afraid that you don’t have the knowledge, great. Go…all you have to have is a homeowner, and somebody with the knowledge is more than happy to step up and partner on that lead with you. If you don’t have the money, somebody with money is more than willing to step in and partner on that lead with you. All of these little…

Dave: Excuses.

Tim: Excuses, circumstances that I was a victim of were taken care of in the club, and I was blinded by that by my greed and my pride.

Melina: That’s really great. So, I love that. When you were saying that $30,000, I was thinking why not just do three deals and make 10 grand each? That’s actually more attainable and more probable.

Oscar: And so much easier with partners.

Melina: Totally, all day long. And creating win, win, wins. And I just wanna point out that, you know, when I look at you now, Tim, and I hear what you’re saying and cutting checks to the rest of your team even though they didn’t participate necessarily in this one particular deal, is that is the conversation and the mindset of somebody who is incredibly wealthy, no matter how much money is in your bank account. That right there is a wealthy, abundant mindset, and you will never be broke again.

Tim: Oh, I’m clear on that.

Dave: Yeah, it’s great.

Tim: I’m just gonna make more money.

Melina: Boom.

Dave: So great, so much wisdom right there. And, man, what growth, what growth in you, man.

Melina: Seriously.

Dave: Pretty remarkable.

Melina: We could do a podcast with the topic of just go make more money. We really could. It’s something I’ve been saying for a long time, that teach people that.

Dave: So I went through the…you know, as we were going through those small groups, and I went into every one of them, and I said, “Somebody point out to me someone in here who has closed a deal 100% by themselves.” And I asked every single group. Nobody could come up with one. I said, “Has there ever been a time when you’ve seen a deal closed that we’ve gone in here and it didn’t have at least two people in it?” And that even goes to Melina and I. We’re trying to figure out the last time that we’ve closed a deal 100% by ourself.

Melina: No. Why would we?

Dave: We couldn’t think of one. Yeah.

Melina: Don’t want to.

Dave: Right. There’s such value in partnering with people. “But I want 100% of the profit.” But 100% of zero is still zero. So, little disclaimer, for those of you that are listening to this, New Wealth Advisors Club itself does not do real estate. All right? So when Tim’s talking about, you know, “I’m going out and doing this, and I’m partnering,” he’s partnering with people that are coming to the club with the mindset and the work ethic that he’s looking. They’re bringing in value to his team. When he said he’s paying people for closing this deal inside the team, those are club members that they’ve met, that they didn’t have relationships with before. Well, I guess with the exception of Josh who you’ve known since you were, like, little kids.

But other than that, they all met at the club. And so, that’s a disclaimer, if you will, for those listening to this. And then, at the same time, the club doesn’t get paid for all these deals that we’re doing. We’re literally just a group of people that have all come together and weeded out some riffraff along the way, and the…

Melina: Bye, Felicia.

Dave: Yeah, the cream’s risen to the top, and then the cream is sitting there, saying, “Okay, guys, I have my own business. I’m doing this.” Those of you that are looking to do that same thing, maybe you should do exactly what Tim just said and say, “Gosh, how can I partner up with somebody else? How can I… I’m worried about this, I’m worried about that, I’m worried about this,” man, why don’t you just start by applying yourself and working on those relationships? Because it sounds like everything else kind of evolves around that.

Melina: I agree. I think that’s great.

Dave: Well, great, great, great conversation, one that we could certainly go on forever. But I think that’s…

Melina: Yeah, I think if we were gonna just, like, you know, bring it all to a close and kind of to a combination, I think that the word for this podcast would be to just be fearless.

Dave: Imagine that.

Melina: How about that?

Dave: Be fearless. Well, until then, we’ll see you at the next club meeting or the next podcast. So with that, we are…

Melina: Flippin’ fearless.

Dave: Nice. I like it.

Melina: And we’re flippin’ out.

Dave: And we’re getting some flippin’ lunch. Let’s go.